My instagram followers and I have been sharing some fairly amazing group tarot sessions lately. For me it’s been a tool of great growth and has helped me connect to my intuition as well as other curious hearts. People tell me that they enjoy reading dozens of messages as much as they like receiving them. It’s magic to see the similar vulnerabilities and find many asking the same questions or pondering the same thoughts.
One question that comes up a lot is “will my relationship last?” This is not just question of curiosity, its one that delves from deep within. Yet it’s most of our minds at some point in time—its one of life’s mysteries. Look to any genre of music and you will hear the theme of finding a partner and sharing a life.
In working through the tarot around the theme of love, my understanding grows. And through the hundreds of readings I’ve done, the word “lasts” echoes endlessly until it begins to lose meaning.
Let’s say marriage lasts a lifetime as we are taught it should in our childhood. Is this a success? But how long does Love last? Happiness? Friendship? Lust? Life itself?
You can be married a thousand years and not experience a day of true partnership. Meanwhile, the truest, purest, wildest, most meant-to-be soul mates who feel love for eachother for decades might have had a union that can’t survive the nitty gritty necessities of the world.
Some relationships end a thousand times often only to begin again in the morning, puffy eyed and sorry. Other times, it’s takes months of awkward silence to fully heal. Eventually, love reaches out over the dark chasm of cold sheets between them to find each other again. You can start fresh, fall back in love, get to know each other all over just as many times as you fall apart.
As little girls we hear fairy tales of true love. As young women we go searching for it. As we age we do more than we ever thought we would to save it. No one teaches us that measurement of marriage is something as deep as it is wide or tall.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with wondering if it will last. Because I know what that means and there’s more to the question than that and when asked I truly seek the answer against my own ego or beliefs.
And so what if it doesn’t last? What if the love, and the time, is not there. As a child of divorce I say, okay, great. It happens and many times in a savior to families. As a woman whose put 15 years together with a partner, the idea of losing this freaks me out. So I relate to those who wonder. As a friend of many happily divorced, women, and especially as a tarot reader, I know that life is never a light switch to be turned off and on: its a forest, a flame, a bustling river, its wind that curls beyond sight. It’s constantly changing and morphing and growing. And it’s two hearts that are sometimes better apart.
I wrote this poem last night. I think it’s a decent way to close. In tarot we have the Two of Cups. Cups in tarot is the entertainment of emotion, heart and love. It often shows up in these relationship based readings as an omen for partnership, a yin and yang, a togetherness of souls, halves which completes the other. So I’m sitting there at date night, two cups before me, thinking of all those with the same question as me: will this last?
When one is low we fill it up.
It overflows, more than enough.
Bone dry at times. And other stuff.
This is the flow of two of cups.