So this is how I found myself, bikini clad, poolside, crying mommy tears into an extra fancy, floral garnished umbrella drink on Mother’s Day.
This morning my son asked me how long it takes to read a whole book. Now, this is a difficult thing to measure unless your timing it, which is impossible what with all the interruptions of reading like having to go to work, feed your family, personal hygiene and HBO Documentaries that need watching.
Anyone whose been to Maui could tell you that the moment you get off the plane the wind greets you with a big warm hug and whispers into your ear “I love you so much already.” I would come to know this wind like a watchful elder who chooses their words carefully and are not to be ignored.
In the hour of your death, I wrote these words for you, Patricia.
Hometown. Side Street.
Think about your home, your town, family artifacts, legends… the story these things tell are linear, and go both back in time and forward and we are but a mere dot existing on that line.
I would walk around with a book in my hand, brush my teeth with a book in my hand, take out the trash with a book in my hand, wash the dishes while leaning over the counter, reading the water splashed pages that I couldn’t tear my eyes off of.
37 years ago today. I took my first breath. Yes. My Life. And yours. Began with a first breath. This is a moment I imagine to possess… Read more “The Element of Air (A Birthday Blog)”
The half-cursive lettering just flows off of the page, like a quickly moving story through time. This was indeed a basic and beautiful time for me; a period of vital self-discovery while I focused solely on my humble home and young child. But what was also revealed to me is how truly lonely and ill-prepared in life I felt at the time. Financial woes, weight insecurities and constantly feeling upset with my husband and annoyed with my friends and sister. Persistent struggles with insomnia. And always the longing for a second child.
You can pry a flower open only to have its petals fall apart. Or you can plant, water, sing to, love on and shine upon a bud and just wait for that glorious bloom. That is true strength, after all, the patience in one’s breath, the willingness to nurture and permit, the allowance of time.